I don’t even know what to say. I was supposed to sleep, but then I never did and now I have to wake up in 5 hours to go to the dentist, probably to come home and sleep again.
You know the reason behind this.
I think we all do.
It’s because of those mice. Y’know, the advertising mice. Corporations grab them and alter them to be trained so that they come into your house and when you are sleeping, they come whisper the names of products they endorse, subliminally forcing you to have an interest in those brands.
That’s why I can’t sleep. They’ll just come and speak to me. I can’t have that.
I know for a fact because I woke up and a mouse was whispering to me. I looked it in the eye and said “no way mouse, I don’t want to buy an iPod. Why don’t you advertise for some Gouda instead. That’d be cool.” and the mouse was like “iPod now compatible with iTrip™ and which is Lindsay Lohan™? Guess right and you could* win a free iPod Nano!”
Grahgahg. I caught him though, he is my pet mouse. I named him algernon and is its fun to play with him cos he is my frend.
We have to stick to our plan. We have to get back to being normal people again with normal sleeping schedules. Otherwise, all our crazy antics will become real. Then you’ll probably end up dead somewhere in Georgia and I’ll never be able to sleep again. DO YOU WANT THIS TO HAPPEN?